Will My Child with a Cleft Be Teased?
Social challenges are a concern for many parents. Here is how to help your child navigate social situations.
Children with visible differences may face teasing at some point. Preparation and support can help your child handle these situations.
- What parents can do:
- Build confidence at home: praise your child for who they are
- Practice responses to questions about their cleft
- Role-play handling teasing ("That doesn't bother me" or "It's part of how I was born")
- Work with the school to educate classmates (if appropriate)
- Connect with other cleft families so your child sees others like them
- What the research shows:
- Many children with cleft are NOT teased
- Those who are teased usually cope well with support
- Confidence is the best protector against bullying
- Self-esteem in cleft children is similar to peers in most studies
- When to get help:
- If your child is withdrawn or avoids school
- If they express sadness about their appearance
- If their grades are dropping
- If they refuse to go to school
- Talk to your cleft team's psychologist
- School strategies:
- Meet with the teacher before the school year
- Discuss how the teacher will handle questions
- Consider a classroom presentation about cleft (age-appropriate)
- Request a buddy system if needed
Clinical Guidance
Not all children with cleft are teased. Building confidence, practicing responses, and working with the school can help your child navigate social situations successfully. The school psychologist and cleft team can provide additional support.